It's My Turn!

It's my turn!  That's how I feel right now!  I am next on the list of people I know to have a baby.  Woo Hoo!

I didn't ever think I would get to this point, and I mean that in two ways.  First of all, I thought I could possibly deliver before some of the ladies I know who had a due date before me.  And secondly, this point at the end of June has taken forever to get here.  I have been waiting for these friends, acquaintances, and family members to have their kids so my turn would be one step closer.

Boy, has it been a long wait!  Since April, I have known 9 or 10 women whose due dates have come and gone.  I have anxiously awaited the birth of their babies, like I have been awaiting the birth of my own.  Each baby born was one more ticked off the list; one step closer to Rachel's turn.  And I am next on the list.  Anytime in the next 5 weeks, I will enter an OR with Rachel in my belly, and I will come out with a precious, little angel in my arms.  This is what I have been waiting for. 

It felt really good last week to realize my time is coming.  4-5 weeks feels so close, but yet so far.  It feels so far because I know what it would mean for my second miracle baby if she were born now.  But her brother made it, and I know she could too.  But the one piece of good news is I am past the point of steroid shots being beneficial to us if a problem were to arise.  Baby girl's lungs would be able to function and will be fully formed by 35 weeks (Saturday), they just need more practice! 

Last week, on the 20th, my cousin's wife and a friend of mine both had their first babies on the same day.  They were the last two before me.  I was ecstatic for them, and then it sunk in:  I won't be watching and waiting for news of anyone else having a baby because next it will be me!  I know several women who are due after me:  4 to be exact.  I told Matt that I hope they don't go before me because this is my turn.  Plus, I would be worried for them, knowing that it would be too early for these babies.

The best thing about all of this is realizing the gift I have been given.  I watched most of these friends of mine announce their pregnancies.  I was always happy, never jealous.  But part of me was wondering if I would ever have another biological child; if I should even consider or try to do that.  I told God if He wanted me to have another baby, He needed to make it happen.  And through this pregnancy He has taught me to trust, and I have a deeper faith.  Here I am at almost 34 1/2 weeks, almost 2 weeks further than I went with Josh and all I can say is I am blessed.  I didn't do anything to get here.  He is watching out for us.  I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow, so we will see what we find out about our miracle, Rachel!